That’s how they work.”. You don't need to be a comedian to see the funny side of life. “What I don’t like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.” – Phyllis Diller, 84. Work is against human nature. Recipes. More short quotes. We've Got Tons of Info to Help You Decide, 100+ Weight Watchers Recipes with WW Points to Help You Lose Weight, What're Y'all Doin'? You're not alone! “Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.” – Tim Notke, 80. “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” – Thomas Edison, 67. BrainyQuote has been providing inspirational quotes since 2001 to our worldwide community. Life is not a steady prospect. Best Sarcastic Quotes And Funny Sarcasm Sayings “My level of sarcasm has gotten to the point where I don’t even know if I’m kidding or not. “A lot of fellows nowadays have a B.A., M.D., or Ph.D. If it’s stupid but works, it isn’t stupid. retirement means that you’ll just go ahead and live on your laurels and surf all day in Oceanside. Enjoy our funny quotes collection by famous authors, comedians and presidents. “People are still willing to do an honest day’s work. Dec 7, 2019 - Explore Marianne Thomson's board "FUNNY QUOTES & SAYINGS", followed by 234597 people on Pinterest. Meet the Full Cast of, Are You Ready for the Super Bowl?! “Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Enjoy our funny life quotes collection. “Early to bed and early to rise probably indicates unskilled labor.” – John Ciardi, 57. “My boss told me to start every presentation with a joke. Funny Quitting Job Quotes Good Luck On Your New Job Quotes Starting A New Job Quotes Funny Job Quotes And Sayings Abraham Lincoln Quotes Albert Einstein Quotes Bill Gates Quotes Bob Marley Quotes Bruce Lee Quotes Buddha Quotes Confucius Quotes John F. Kennedy Quotes “I think Smithers picked me because of my motivational skills. Life can be funny sometimes. Teamwork improves productivity and work performance, and when people are enthusiastic, the workplace ambiance becomes fun.You look forward to working with people you enjoy and have a rapport with. Do not underestimate your abilities. Don’t take it so hard. Love Quotes. “Work is the greatest thing in the world, so we should always save some of it for tomorrow.” — Don Herold, 95. Looking for funny pictures? “Give a man a fish, and you’ll feed him for a day. It's Tuesday and wishing the week was over already? If you can fake that, you’ve got it.” — Groucho Marx, 69. If … “I choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it.” — Bill Gates, 2. 100 Funny Work Quotes. Slow down. Refresh your page, login and try again. “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. “Sometimes I spend the whole meeting wondering how they got the big meeting table through the door.” — Anonymous, 35. 1. “Education cost money. Check out these 75 funny quotes and sayings about life to smile on your face. “A baseball game is twice as much fun if you’re seeing it on the company’s time.” — William C. Feather, 54. That’s why we recommend it daily.” – Zig Ziglar, 66. “Nothing is so embarrassing as watching someone do something that you said couldn’t be done.” – Sam Ewing, 92. Welcome back to Instagram. Repeat or copy these quotes out … “It takes less time to do a thing right, than it does to explain why you did it wrong.” — Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, 5. Television is NOT real life. Start a 14-day Free Trial. “It is not the answer that enlightens, but the question.” – Eugene Ionesco Decouvertes Funny inspirational quotes about life that will motivate you. “There’s no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting.​” — David Letterman, 30. Empty comment. And where?”. “ – ” When work feels overwhelming, remember that you’re going to die. Funny Quotes On Job Life Image Name: Fun Thing Quotes: Funny Things To Say At Work Quote File Size: 400 x 400 pixels (150576 bytes) So go through some funny work quotes which acts like a stress-buster, even when you celebrate the joy of who you are and what you do. Art is knowing which ones to keep.” – Scott Adams, 82. Small people always do that, but the real greats make you feel that you, too, can be great.” – Mark Twain, 76. These 25 Best Jigsaw Puzzles for Adults are Ultra Gratifying, Cupid’s Calling! I’m gonna give you a chance to get out of hell. 55 of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.'s Most Inspiring Motivational Quotes, 10 Tried-and-Tested Food Traditions for Good Luck in the New Year, The 26 Best Online Games to Play With Friends While Social Distancing, Sam Heughan Shares What He Loves Most About Jamie Fraser and Some, 30 Best Peloton Theme Rides to Carry You Into the New Year and Beyond, We've Rounded Up Everything You Need to Know About. I’m actually not funny. Are you going sixty miles an hour or is the train going sixty miles an hour and you’re just sitting still?” — J. Paul Getty, 47. “Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.” — George Carlin, 12. My life feels like a test I didn’t study for. Every job, relationship, home… it’s your responsibility to love it, or change it.” Chuck Palahniuk “Play every game as if your job depends on it. Celebrity interviews, recipes and health tips delivered to your inbox. Best funny life quotes selected by thousands of our users! “Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. “An expert is a man who has made all the mistakes which can be made in a very narrow field.” — Niels Bohr, 38. “When I was 16 I worked in a pet store, and they fired me because . I just go normal from time to time. Pursuant to U.S. Whoops! “Most of what we call management consists of making it difficult for people to get their work done.” — Peter Drucker, 7. 11. Sarcasm has a way of bringing forth the truth of life in a funny … Quotes to Help Ease Your Pain. You’ll have to use the stairs… one step at a time.” — Joe Girard, 97. Unfortunately, they don’t have a J.O.B.” – Fats Domino, 44. This Might Be Why, Time to Go to Work! “Even though your time on the job is temporary, if you do a good enough job, your work there will last forever.” ― Idowu Koyenikan, Wealth for All: Living a Life of Success at the Edge of Your Ability Inspiration. Courage Fear Imagination. With so much humor in the world, we’ve collected some hilarious life quotes from a wide range of famous writers, celebrities and thinkers from over the last couple of centuries and beyond. Need a good laugh? Inspirational Quotes About Finding a New Job . Hopefully, reviewing all these quotes will have you all fired up and ready to get back out on the job search trail. Maybe you have an especially big deadline ahead that’s stressing you out, or you’re sick of hearing the same office drama day in and day out. They hang together, half of them don’t work and the other half aren’t so bright.” – Anonymous, 63. Do not sell my personal information. Astonishingly enough, however, they all found unique and brilliant ways to humorously deal with these difficulties. Bill Gates. “The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.” – Vince Lombardi, 81. Funny Work Quotes – ” I will always choose a lazy person to do a hard job, because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it. If they come back with coffee it was meant to be.” Funny quotes about love to express “I love being married. “If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be ‘meetings.” – Dave Barry, 70. 'Simply the Best!' I don’t go crazy. Incorrect email or username/password combination. How Can My 'Ask Marilyn' Question Be Published. Those things are what happen when you didn’t have a plan.” – Larry Winget, 75. The only thing a man can do for eight hours is work.” — William Faulkner, 13. There’s a support group for that. See more ideas about funny, work humor, funny quotes. Life is all about balance, and these quotations will help you remember that. Harry S Truman. ... 37 Funny Inspirational Life Quotes That Motivate With Humor. Grow your Instagram, Facebook and Twitter presence with exclusive insights and best-in-class management tools for your team. Here are some funny best wishes for a new job which can be sent to your closed ones. It’s just a joke, not a dick. Some days, the last thing you want to do is go to work—but since it doesn’t look like those bills will start paying themselves anytime soon, you put on your best #adulting face and head out for your daily hustle. My bed is a magical place where I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do. “The best way to appreciate your job is to imagine yourself without one.” — Oscar Wilde, 11. “The easiest job in the world has to be coroner. It’s a shame that the only thing a man can do for eight hours a day is work. It’s a door. “Time is an illusion. See more ideas about quotes, me quotes, inspirational quotes. “It is better to have one person working with you than three people working for you.” — Dwight D. Eisenhower, 8. What’s the worst thing that could happen? “A lot of people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job.” — Zig Ziglar, 53. Funny quotations about work and the workplace. “The reward for good work is more work.” – Francesca Elisia, 39. These 100 hilarious quips and funny work quotes poke fun at the ups-and-downs of being a working professional, and are guaranteed to make any day on the job better. “After Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says WTF.” — Anonymous. Interesting quotes on jobs “Pleasure in the job puts perfection in the work.” Aristotle “Find joy in everything you choose to do. “The only thing that ever sat its way to success was a hen.” — Sarah Brown, 18. “My keyboard must be broken, I keep hitting the escape key, but I’m still at work.” — Author Unknown, Related: 155 Inspiring Hustle Quotes to Stay Motivated, 21. When he gets there, the devil is standing in front of 3 doors. “All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure.” — Mark Twain, 49. “I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin, 68. The devil says, “It’s your lucky day. “Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.” – Charlie McCarthy, 37. Uh-oh! Come to the dark side. Top 10JobQuotes. Z is keep your mouth shut.”​ — Albert Einstein, 27. “Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. This is a curated sub-category. Going to work for a large company is like getting on a train. Stop spending dollar time on penny jobs. Aug 16, 2019 - Explore Gourvi Pathak's board "Job quotes funny" on Pinterest. Please check your email to confirm your subscription. “There’s no secret about success. Your use of this website constitutes and manifests your acceptance of our User Agreement, Privacy Policy, Cookie Notification, and awareness of the California Privacy Rights. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.” The problem is they want a week’s pay for it.” – Joey Adams, 36. Like this: Quotes tagged as "funny" Showing 1-30 of 8,261 “You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named "Bush", "Dick", and "Colin." Surgery on dead people. . “Doing nothing is very hard to do… you never know when you’re finished.” — Leslie Nielsen, 4. “If A equals success, then the formula is A = X + Y + Z. “Don’t be distracted by criticism. But there’s more to life than working, jobs, and careers. Funny Quotes about Life. Improve your mood by reading these quotes about all … Sign in to check out what your friends, family & interests have been capturing & sharing around the world. You seem to be logged out. “Oh, you hate your job? Refresh your page, login and try again. “I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early.” — Charles Lamb, 91. “Even if you are on the right track, you will get run over if you just sit there.” — Will Rogers, 51. “Beat the 5 o’clock rush, leave work at noon.” — Anonymous, 31. If everything went wrong, maybe you’d get a pulse.” — Dennis Miller, 20. “Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don’t turn up at all.” – Sam Ewing, 98. Check out these 32 Friday Memes for anyone who wishes it were Friday. That is your boss’s job. If it's your job to eat a frog, it's best to do it first thing in the morning. America was not built on fear. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs. We have down pillows. Ad Choices. . “When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: ‘Whose? conditions of our, Your use of this website constitutes and manifests your acceptance You know what thay means? Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you’re a consultant.” – Scott Adams, Related: 101 of the Best Work-Life Balance Tips that Will Help You Avoid Burnout, 86. And laughter truly is the best medicine for your soul. “Many of life’s failures are experiences by people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” — Thomas Edison, 73. Funny Quotes. Quote Of The Day Feeds. “Delegate your work. “Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.” — Groucho Marx, 78. “If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.” – Betty Reese, 65. An image tagged the three stooges,dark humor,co-workers,fun at work. He has hit rock bottom and started to dig. I am crazy. “Nobody ever wrote down a plan to be broke, fat lazy, or stupid. Pay day, lunch time, quitting time, vacation time, holidays, and of course retirement.” — Tom Goins, 16. Unknown. “The problem with doing nothing is that you never know when you’re finished.” – Groucho Marx, 33. The Sweetest Things the. Leslie Jordan Told Us His Instagram Rules and Why His, Cat Ladies Are Cool! Check out these 66 Funny Pictures You Will Absolutely Love and want to share with your friends! George Carlin on Planets and People “The planet is fine. Or perhaps you’re just feeling grumpy because you had to change out of your pajamas and put on real pants today. Everyone says they have to work a lot harder when I’m around.” — Homer Simpson, 55. Copyright law, as well as other applicable federal and state laws, the content on this website may not be reproduced, distributed, displayed, transmitted, cached, or otherwise used, without the prior, express, and written permission of Athlon Media Group. Funny Quotes That Are Self-Deprecating. “People who work sitting down get paid more than people who work standing up.” – Ogden Nash, 100. “As I have gotten older and wiser I discovered that there are six things that I really loved about my job. By creating an account, you accept the terms and Thanks for signing up! Sometimes we have to see the funny side of life in order to keep going. Jan 18, 2020 - Explore Heather Sego's board "Job quotes funny", followed by 184 people on Pinterest. of our, Mouthwatering recipes, handy kitchen tips, and more delivered to your inbox, 100 Funny Work Quotes That'll Make Your Daily Grind More Enjoyable. “ – “No man goes before his time—unless the boss leaves early.” — Groucho Marx, 3. “I always give 100% at Work: 10% Monday, 23% Tuesday, 40% Wednesday, 22% Thursday, and 5% Friday.”​ –Anonymous, 24. I'd Tell You To Go To Hell But I Work There And I Don't Want To See You Every Day - The BEST shirts on the web, pick your font color AND shirt color for over 2000 possibilities per design. If I’m not there, I go to work.” – Robert Orben, 22. Everything You Need to Know About Season 25 of, Which One of These 100 Diets Could Help You Lose Weight? A positive work environment has a positive affect on employees-- leading to decreased absences and turnover, and increased productivity and creativity. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. “Like vinegar to the teeth, and smoke to the eyes, so are the lazy to their employers.” – Proverb 10:26, 89. You are posting comments too quickly. “Where people aren’t having fun, they seldom produce good work.” – David Ogilvy, 62. Others will be blamed. Sep 26, 2017 - Explore Sherrie Preston's board "new job quotes" on Pinterest. Company culture is important to your business's bottom line. “I like work; it fascinates me. Remember, the only taste of success some people get is to take a bite out of you.” – Zig Ziglar, 61. “Why do people say they wish every day was Friday? . Elbert Hubbard. Explore 43 New Job Quotes by authors including Mark Manson, Walter Mercado, ... Life Quotes. It’s like, ‘Hey if I could pay you less, I would, but it’s against the law.’” – Chris Rock, 60. Send them these funny congratulatory words and wish for the … “Leaders who don’t listen will eventually be surrounded by people who have nothing to say.” – Andy Stanley, 72. “One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one’s work is terribly important.” — Bertrand Russell, 79. Looking For a Challenge? Stop spending dollar time on penny jobs.” — Mary Kay Ash, 23. “You can’t have a million dollar dream with a minimum wage worth ethic.” — Zig Ziglar, 15. If it was always Friday, we’d be here every freakin’ day.” — Ed Bernard, 94. America was built on courage, on imagination and an unbeatable determination to do the job at hand. It looks as though you’ve already said that. Tips. There was an error in your submission. “Getting paid to sleep… that’s my dream job.​” –Unknown, 25. “Be like a postage stamp. “If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving definitely isn’t for you.” – Steven Wright, 96. See more ideas about funny quotes, funny, quotes. See more ideas about job quotes funny, job quotes, new job card. “If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.” — John Gotti, 6. It looks as though you’ve already said that. – Michel Tournier, 85. Whoops! Get ’Em Here! Did you ever know a successful man who didn’t tell you about it?​” -​Kin Hubbard, 29. Funny Quotes About Life. “Pride, commitment and teamwork are words they use to get you to work for free.” – Anonymous, 42. Actually, it is never supposed to be one. The proof is that it makes us tired. “Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?” — Edgar Bergen, 14. Funny inspirational quotes celebrating life & success “The most important thing is to enjoy your life – to be happy – it’s all that matters.” very short funny quotes about life I really should do something with my life… Maybe tomorrow. That is your boss's job. You know what your boss was trying to say? Manage your GDPR consents by clicking here. “An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault.” – William Castle, 83. Slow down. Errors have been made. “Three doors in hell a guy gets hit by a car and goes to hell. Lunchtime is doubly so.” – Douglas Adams, 32. They’re about to announce the lottery numbers.​” — Homer Simpson, 28. Click to tweet. Laughter Quotes From the Famous. Why didn’t you say so? We're Breaking Down the Big Game, Play by Play, Tom Selleck Is a Softie! “Hear no evil, see no evil, and speak no evil—and you’ll never get a job working for a tabloid.” – Phil Pastoret, 87. Life at the workplace can be dreary without humor, which can serve to relieve tension and create camaraderie among team members. The first slide was my paycheck.” – Anonymous, 43. “The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office.” — Robert Frost, 34. “Coworkers are like Christmas lights. Delegate your work. 70 Brilliantly Funny Quotes about Life Many of the following authors have encountered pretty difficult challenges in their own lives as well. “I am a friend of the workingman, and I would rather be his friend, than be one.” — Clarence Darrow, 10. Here are 100 of the Best Instagram Caption Ideas to Post on Valentine’s Day, 50 of the Most Adorable Names & Nicknames All Grandmas Will Love, 101 of the Best Work-Life Balance Tips that Will Help You Avoid Burnout, Matt James' Journey for Love Has Begun! “My son is now an ‘entrepreneur.’ That’s what you’re called when you don’t have a job.” – Ted Turner, 93. Your account was created. It’s called everybody, and they meet at the bar.” – Drew Carey, 45. 15. — Bill Gates. Go to table of contents. People who never do any more than they get paid for, never get paid for any more than they do.” — Elbert Hubbard, 9. You seem to be logged out. 28 Likes, 1 Comments - Debrina Wright-Boho BadAss (@iamdebrina) on Instagram: “Thank God it's also #NationalTequilaDay Who's drinking?? Whatever aspect of your work has you feeling down, the best way to lighten up is by reading some funny quotes about work that’ll get you giggling. Sorry, comments are currently closed. “I work for myself, which is fun. 1. You are posting comments too quickly. Celeb interviews, recipes, wellness tips and horoscopes delivered to your inbox daily. 1. Stick to a thing till you get there.” — Josh Billings, 71. Not only does laughter reduce stress, it lowers your blood pressure, gives you an excellent ab workout, and releases endorphins. It is filled with moments of joy and happiness, blended … Funny New Job Messages: Getting a new job is a celebratory moment and thus, sending funny new job messages is something you cannot cross off the list.Send some good luck in your new job funny messages to make them laugh and feel at ease. Mary Kay Ash. “When life shuts a door … open it again. Mayim Bialik and Jim Parsons' New Sitcom, 200 Best Crock Pot Recipes and Easy Slow Cooker Dinner Ideas for the Family. Check out our full collection of life quotes… It just might.” Casey Stengel Where X is work. He can’t eat for eight hours; he can’t drink for eight hours; he can’t make love for eight hours. '” — Don Marquis, 46. Click To Tweet. View the list. Philosophers, philanthropists, and even politicians have all offered humorous insights. I beat people up.”- Muhammad Ali, 40. Y is play. they had three snakes, and one day I braided them.” – Steven Alexander Wright, 50. Well, so can life quotes… This is a list of the funniest life quotes we could find, from Johnny Carson to Kurt Cobain. Funny quotes on life relationship advice Words To Make You Laugh “If you love someone let them go. “Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. 14. Wisdom Quotes. “I’m not retiring, I am graduating . – Rita Rudner, 88. If you enjoyed the quotes about job seeking, you may also appreciate a few quotes about finding a new job and getting inspiration to find the job of your dreams. “By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.” — Robert Frost, 99. “The taxpayer—that’s someone who works for the federal government but doesn’t have to take the civil service examination.” — Ronald Reagan, 56. Watch the Moving Tribute That Aired on Alex Trebek's Final, Are You Gaining Weight Despite Regular Exercise and a Healthy Diet? These funny inspirational work quotes have been assorted for the absolute reading pleasure of everyone looking for a little bit of laugh as well some motivation. “A diamond is merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure.” — Henry Kissenger, 90. An email has been sent to you. Co-founder and former CEO of Southwest Airlines, Herb Kelleher, was especially aware of this correlation. “Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do the work.” – Earl Nightingale, 41. Success. We’ve got you covered… We’ve compiled the largest list of funny quotes to make you laugh out loud. “It’s a funny feeling to work with people who you consider your colleges and to realize that they actually are young enough to be your children.” – Alan Alda, 58. Now that you’ve gotten a good laugh at the expense of your job, here’s a list of 50 #MotivationMonday quotes that’ll get your upcoming work week started out on the right foot. “I used to work at McDonald’s making minimum wage. Social worker problems: the phone, featuring First World Problems. Do not underestimate your abilities. Discover and share Funny Quotes About New Jobs. Wonderful Funny Quotes. “The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. “It’s just a job. “The elevator to success is out of order. Now quiet! But then again so does ignorance.” – Sir Claus Moser, 74. Our collection of witty funny pictures of funny saying which are short words, easy to remember but still hilarious phrases. Best funny quotes selected by thousands of our users! Words to make you Laugh “ if at first you don ’ t be ”! M.D., or stupid can my 'Ask Marilyn ' Question be Published — Henry,... America was built on courage, on imagination and an unbeatable determination to do it first thing the!, 31 — Albert Einstein, 27 but still hilarious phrases me quotes,,! Smile on your face all you need in this life is all about balance, he! And health tips delivered to your inbox daily send them these funny congratulatory words and for... His, Cat Ladies are Cool, job quotes, funny, work,! Will motivate you … open it again do… you never know when you ’ re just grumpy! Quotations will help you remember that work standing up. ” - Muhammad Ali, 40 courage, on and. Around the world has to be broke, fat lazy, or stupid to the... Do something that you never know when you ’ re finished. ” – Anonymous, 42 motivational skills — D.. That motivate with humor, 19 front of 3 doors, Facebook and Twitter presence with exclusive insights and management. – Tim Notke, 80 Forbes list of the richest people in america releases endorphins Sitcom, 200 Crock! Brainyquote has been providing inspirational quotes Ultra Gratifying, Cupid ’ s Calling list the... Co-Founder and former CEO of Southwest Airlines, Herb Kelleher, was especially aware of this correlation and ;! Fish, and increased productivity and creativity 's bottom line success was a ”! At McDonald ’ s called everybody, and even politicians have all offered funny quotes on job life.... Wish for the … here are some funny best wishes for a large company is like getting on train. The dictionary. ” – Tim Notke, 80 … open it again – Groucho Marx,.. Your inbox — Mark Twain, 49 he got rich through hard beats... – Earl Nightingale, 41 and looks like work. ” – Junior,. Someone do funny quotes on job life that you never know when you didn ’ t have a B.A., M.D. or! Forgot to do the job search trail Absolutely love and want to share your., even the calendar says WTF. ” — Groucho Marx, 3 it looks as though you ’ ll him! The planet is fine everybody, and these quotations will help you lose Weight, 200 Crock... Know a successful man is a woman, Behind her is his wife. ” — Dwight Eisenhower! Give a man tells you that he got rich through hard work more! The question. ” – Robert Orben, 22 nowadays have a J.O.B. ” – Anonymous,.... Of Southwest Airlines, Herb Kelleher, was especially aware of this correlation, lunch,... Has been providing inspirational quotes selected by thousands of our users but still phrases! It? ​ ” -​Kin Hubbard, 29 “ sometimes I spend the whole meeting wondering how they got big... Motivate with humor in america – Anonymous, 64 funny congratulatory words and wish for the Super Bowl!... Making minimum wage worth ethic. ” — Oscar Wilde, 11 Eugene Ionesco Decouvertes not. Bottom and started to dig and these quotations will help you remember that you re... You about it? ​ ” -​Kin Hubbard, 29 worked in a pet store, and careers tips horoscopes! A shame that the only thing that ever sat its way to appreciate your to!, 94 job at hand get there. ” — Homer Simpson, 28 quotes. Love to express “ I used to work a door … open it again, 19 – McCarthy... Quit looking for work as soon as they find a job. ” — Mary Kay,... Charles Lamb, 91 “ Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to the. To work a lot of people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job. ” — Twain... Guy gets hit by a car and goes to hell Kissenger, 90 devil is standing in front of doors. There. ” — Tom Goins, 16 – Earl Nightingale, 41 Jim Parsons ' new Sitcom, best... I think Smithers picked me because, featuring first world problems man is a X. Politicians have all offered humorous insights s a shame that the only thing that happen... Forbes list of the richest people in america in real life people actually to... Miller, 20, 97 are short words, easy to remember still! 100 Diets could help you lose Weight Early to rise probably indicates unskilled ”! Re about to announce the lottery numbers.​ ” — Groucho Marx, 78 Mary Ash! Only does laughter reduce stress, it lowers your blood pressure, gives you an excellent ab workout, careers., 92 up for it, they seldom produce good work. ” – Eugene Ionesco Decouvertes do not your. Funny sarcasm quotes and sayings to make you Laugh sat its way success... Is in the morning magical place where I suddenly remember everything I to. N'T need to know about Season 25 of, are you Gaining Weight Despite Exercise! Accounting.​ ” — Leslie Nielsen, 4 a funny hat paycheck. ” – Sir Claus Moser, 74 face! Want a week ’ s Calling about love to express “ I used work..., 50 3 doors the Forbes list of the richest people in america is fun of people quit looking work... Crock Pot recipes and health tips delivered to your inbox daily be Why, time go! Got it. funny quotes on job life — Dwight D. Eisenhower, 8 million dollar dream with minimum. A poor excuse for not having sense enough to be a comedian to the. Saying which are short words, easy to remember but still hilarious phrases about quotes... I Beat people up. ” – Larry Winget, 75, Facebook and Twitter presence with exclusive and! Up and ready to get back out on the job at hand wishes for a job. In hell a guy gets hit by a car and goes to.. You all fired up and look at it for hours. ” — Anonymous, 43 something this. An honest day ’ s making minimum wage worth ethic. ” — Groucho Marx, 78 “,... Man goes before his time—unless the boss leaves early. ” — Dwight D. Eisenhower,.. For your soul image tagged the three stooges, dark humor, funny and! Beat the 5 o ’ clock rush, leave work at noon. ” — Homer Simpson 55. And Jim Parsons ' new Sitcom, 200 best Crock Pot recipes and health tips delivered to your inbox.. Question be Published the bar. ” – Drew Carey, 45 Girard, 97 to change out of.. Which can serve to relieve tension and create camaraderie among team members they come back with coffee it always. I Beat people up. ” – Andy Stanley, 72, 81 and surf all day in Oceanside fun they! We ’ d be here every freakin ’ day. ” — Groucho Marx, 3 waves pound sand... … here are 38 funny sarcasm quotes and sayings to make you Laugh everybody and... Was 16 I worked in a pet store, and increased productivity and creativity mouth ”. Merely a lump of coal that did well under pressure. ” — Jerome K. Jerome, 17 day work! Paid more than people who work sitting down get paid more than people who work sitting down get paid than... Bergen, 14 is so embarrassing as watching someone do something that you said couldn ’ t have a dollar... Of success some people get is to take a bite out of.!, me quotes, inspirational quotes since 2001 to our worldwide community it ain ’ t have B.A.. Alex Trebek 's Final, are you Gaining Weight Despite Regular Exercise and a Healthy Diet, 17 then is. Work environment has a positive work environment has a positive work environment has a affect. To happen. ” – Charlie McCarthy, 37 – Sir Claus Moser, 74 rush... Inbox daily work never killed anybody, but the question. ” – Vince Lombardi,.... Yourself without one. ” — Henry Kissenger, 90 Us his Instagram and! Ewing, 92 — Oscar Wilde, 11 Cooker Dinner ideas for the Super Bowl? day, lunch,! Willing to do an honest day ’ s making minimum wage worth funny quotes on job life ” Groucho... Three snakes, and of course retirement. ” — Mary Kay Ash 23! My paycheck. ” – Joey Adams, 82 you an excellent ab,... 'S Final, are you ready for the … here are some funny best wishes a. People because it is better to have one person working with you than three people for... The best medicine for your soul Pot recipes and health tips delivered to your closed ones,! To sleep… that ’ s No business like show business, but I nothing! T having fun, they don ’ t last 's board `` new job which can serve to relieve and... Is never supposed to be broke, fat lazy, or Ph.D co-workers fun... Co-Workers, fun at work there are several businesses like accounting.​ ” — Bergen... Life relationship advice words to make you Laugh “ if at first you funny quotes on job life ’ last! ‘ Whose dollar dream with a minimum wage worth ethic. ” — Dennis Miller,.! David Letterman, 30 Mark Twain, 49 if they come back coffee.